The Six Month Mark Approacheth

On December 12, she'll have graced us with her existance for six whole months. Every time I pick her up, kiss her, or even hear her cry, I think about her sweet little baby self and feel so thankful. I think this is one way having kids helps you get closer to God. Experiencing love, amazement, and breath-catching, heart-stopping wonder is truly divine. It lifts me up. It keeps me in the present moment. It keeps me grateful. It keeps me humble. I love it! I am so amazed and present and grateful and humbled by this whole wonderful, heart-stopping, breath-catching, parenting thing!

I'm also thankful for the many people who are so helpful to us as we try our hand at parenting, they're like the bumpers in our parenting bowling lane. That seemed a good way to describe them, but now I'm not sure where to go with the bowling comparison. Our parents and friends and new parent friends are all so great to bounce ideas and problems off of. They keep us from rolling into the gutter, and bounce us into the lane and help us get a strike!? Well, you get the idea. They're great. There's a group of San Lorenzo Valley moms who get together weekly or more. We have a hangout and eat afternoon, where the babies loll around on the floor or crawl all over each other, and then we try to go hiking together,too. It is turning into a great support, and the best part is, all the other moms are okay with talking about babies and baby stuff for hours on end.

Adessa has tried a few new foods, and is getting stronger at sitting up. She's increasingly adept with her hands, passing toys back and forth, grabbing at our food, glasses, jewlery, pens, you name it. She strokes my hand while she nurses, even in the middle of the night. She talks, drones and "Ehhhh"s, shrieks and screams, trying out the gamut of vocalizations. She's so very fun.

Major Holiday Number Two

Thanksgiving went well, her second big holiday if you don't count the 4th of July or Labor Day. We celebrated twice, early with Calvin's family, then on the day with mine. Both were pretty low key, just some delicious food, aunts and uncles (Elijah played a large part)and cousins, and friends from church.

Adessa didn't feast on Thanksgiving day, but she did try out some rice cereal a few days later. And she loves food. We started feeding her solids because she's terribly interested in food, especially what we're eating, and because... drum roll... she's sitting up! For minutes at time, our girl sits up, reaches for toys in front of her, totters a bit, rights herself, keeps sitting. Each sitting session has ended with a face plant into the floor, but she is not discouraged! Oh no, not Adessa, she try, tries again. So fun. I'm getting kind of freaked out by the milestones, as the baby part is just starting to make sense, soon I'll have to pack food for her, she'll crawl, she'll talk back, YIKES!

A side benefit to babies, though- today she got me out of jury duty. Jury duty is something I believe in absolutely, as part of our democratic process. I feel deeply my responsibility to my fellow Americans. However, I pleaded hardship as fast as I could and got out of the court room towing my breast pump! It never hurts to bring props, right? Yipee!!

Happy Halloween, now it's almost Thanksgiving?

The first few weeks with Adessa seemed to go by pretty slowly, actually. We were present, right there in each and every moment, marveling, and it seemed to take... a few weeks. And we continue to marvel at her, but darn! does the time fly by! She turned five months old yesterday. Wait! Am I getting this? I try to quiz myself and see if I remember the smaller version of Adessa, but it's hard when the 16+ pound version is so all-consuming. She's almost sitting, can balance on her own for a few seconds at a time if her legs are out in front of her at just the right angles. She has not tired of staring at her hands, holding them out as if they were fabulous treasures she needs to inspect. She found her toes a few times, and they seem to be neato, as well. There is a whole new level of interaction because she has more control of her hands. She babbles to us while holding our chins with one mini-hand, reaches for toys, bats at toys, eats napkins, crinkles paper, etc. She lets us know her more sophisticated needs, now, so there's a bit more crying in our house. Also some whispering. I held her hands on her chest and whispered sweet nothings to her at bedtime the other day, and I promise you, she whispered back. It was the baby babble equivalent of whispering, out from behind her pacifier: shhheeehshuuushhaaaa. Really cute.

Halloween was spent with much spirit and revelry! We went to little Sadie's Halloween Party with Adessa as the Cupcake Fairy. (She probably wondered if this was the first of many humiliating homemade costumes she's going to be subjected to. Probably is.) (The Cupcake Fairy, for those who don't know, is the little sprite who leaves money under your pillow whenever you loose your cupcake. Yep.) And on Halloween itself she promenaded downtown Santa Cruz as a darling sweet pea in a pod. (Or Edamamie, for those who appreciate Japanese cuisine.) She's a trooper. It's fun to take her places, she likes riding in the car (for reasonable time periods) and is taking in all the new stimulus and activity like a pro. She rocks!

Pumpkin Time

Now she's growing gang-busters. I guess I should stop writing stuff like that since she's only going to grow more and do more exciting things. But really, everyday there's something new. I can practically see the little cogs in her mind gearing up: hmmm, these chubby pink things on the end of my arms must be mine. They wiggle and wave around in front of me, I can suck on them, scratch at my crib, hold on to toys, pat my mom, and even yank her hair. She's begun lolling around on the ground, stretching for toys and learning how to maneuver herself. And lots more to look forward to!

Adessa and I went with a local mothers group to a pumpkin patch up the coast. The other babies were older, and they climbed all over the pumpkins and crawled all over the patch. Adessa simply reclined and posed for photos, a queen sprawled against her squashy throne. Adorable. The holidays are going to be so much more fun with a kid around.

I had another difficult day of Adessa coming with me to school. She's getting to the age where she is noticing everything and easily overstimulated, which made it really hard for her to fall asleep. Which made her very fussy. Which made me sad. Especially because three days of childcare with three different people (the grandmas can only do one day each) doesn't seem like a stable, consistant care situation that I would like. So we'll see.

New Tricks

Did you blink? Now she's four months old!
Adessa is wriggling and squiggling all over the place. She's rolled over both from front to back and from back to front, (on accident, but it still counts) and has become hard to change at diaper time. She used to fall right asleep when she was tired, but now she wants to see and touch everything around her. Sheets, crib-sides, her pacifier are all interesting enough to distract her. She has found her fists and is interested in toys. She's trying hard to make trumpeting noises, and knows I like encouraging her in this endeavor, so when she catches my eye she'll start pursing her lips and trying. Many happy spit bubbles later, we laugh and cheer. Very endearing. She's delightful!!

I am adjusting to the working mom thing! It's going to be fine! Adessa has people who love her taking care of her every minute of every day. And I am okay with it. I do relish my days off with her, though, 60% of a real job was a good idea.

Sweet Baby Goes To School...

...and mama gets nothing done. Well, that was the first Monday I took her, September 17th. I think I made a few copies, returned a phone call and made references to the work I wasn't getting done. Discouraged, I went home and called Grandma Beck who rescued me the rest of my working days that week. This week I tried again to bring her with me on Monday (the 24th) and it went much better. I attribute the improvement to the fact that I brought a swing for her. That, and the fact that I did most of the work I needed to do over the weekend so everything was ready to go when I got there. It looks like the three days of my work week will be broken up into: one day with me, one day with the Lewis grandparents, and one day with the Beck grandparents. I am so lucky to have them close by and willing to help.

Working certainly makes me appreciate Adessa-- I hate to leave her in the mornings, and I love to squeeze her when I get home. I also realize why stay-at-home-momming is such a good idea: no breast-pump, no interrupted nap times, no added other thing I should be doing. Maybe someday I'll be able to stay home--but until then, this set-up should work out fine.

Adessa is doing great. She's had her first cold, which is hard to watch. She has begun talking up a storm and bringing everything she can grasp into her mouth. It seems she makes changes daily. Sweet is the adjective that still comes bubbling up to describe her. She'll interrupt herself while nursing to smile up at me. She'll talk and coo to herself for a bit, and then get louder until I look at her. Then she'll smile. Sweet!

Three Months of Adessa

This week Adessa turned three months old. What a lovely time we're having, too, as the pictures will show. She is adorable and sweet like always, with bonuses of interaction and development that are so incredibly amazing to watch and be a part of. She can be coaxed into a smile almost anytime now, sometimes in the middle of a crying jag at her tiredest. She holds her head up strong, doesn't mind "tummy time" too much, and has started slobbering on anything that finds its way into her mouth, sometimes her hand, sometimes her shirt. The biggest adjustment for me has been that most of my functioning brain is now devoted to baby details, leaving the meager remainder of my cerebral power to deal with whatever it was that used to occupy me full-time.

Tomorrow is her first day of school, or at least of coming to school with me. The first three weeks I was back at work, Calvin took vacation days to watch her so I could get everything going. Thank goodness he did, too. I set up my homeschoolers and English Language Development class, and am ready to have a baby accompany me through my days. Am I ready? This has actually caused a bit of anxiety. I am fearful I won't do either thing well, teaching or mothering, with Adessa at school with me. We'll see. Both grandmas have made themselves available to help out and will watch her when I'm actually teaching, which is great. And I have to keep reminding myself that I'm only working three days a week. I'll keep you posted.

Yummy

Last night I was holding Adessa after feeding her, right before bed. She was dozzing, and I rocked her and kissed her and nuzzled her, and it made me feel two things so strongly- 1. overwhelmed with love for her bitsy, soft, baby-ness, and amazed that I get to love her from so close; and 2. desirous of kalamata olives, maybe with some chopped cucumber, tomato, and red onion. That's because our Adessa is a feta-factory. She industriously produces what smells like feta cheese, with nothing more than breastmilk, and within the confines of her very own tiny crevices and crannies (neck, armpit, ears, hands, etc.) Premium cheese. (They do very expensive things with bat guano, maybe someone should look into the market for breastmilk cheese?) I took her to the doctor for her 2-month well-baby check, and he told me, very helpfullly, after looking at her neck: "You know you can clean this out?" Yes, thank you. Note to self: bathe baby before next doctor's visit. He's not such a fan of Greek salad, apparently. OPA!

She's two months old (officially, now,) (and nine weeks). She's awake and aware more often, and I've a feeling that I could really do something wrong, now, as a parent. She always is looking at me, watching me, sometimes it creeps me out. Does she need more stimulation? Less? Is it okay that she likes her baby swing? Is her head going to be flattened? I think it's the beginning of normal mommy guilt, but again, new territory for me.

She smiles, she tracks toys, she's found her fists. She'll stick her tiny tounge out if I stick mine out. We know so little about her, really. What her hair color will end up being, will she ever outgrow her mullet? Eye color, talents, interests, good singing voice or not, good teeth-- it's all to be revealed.
She's the strong, silent type, so far, mystery is part of her allure. Parents are like undercover cops, I think, trying to bait their kids into giving something away, detectives on an 18 year stake-out. Waiting is most of our job at this point, with plenty of photodocumentation for analysis back at the lab.

Eight weeks old!

Adessa will be eight weeks old tomorrow (Tuesday, August 7th). Oddly, she won't be two months old until August 12, but who's counting? (Me, over and over, and I'm confused about how old she is.) At any rate, she's growning and developing and cooing and SMILING!! That's a lot of fun -- she will be coaxed into a smile by our energetic and overanimated smiling and baby talking sessions, or sometimes I'll catch her smiling at me when I happen to glance over at her. Totally melts my heart. I've loved our girl from the beginning, but lately have had the sensation of falling in love. This relationship is a process, and it is soooo cool to be a part of. We definitely decided right, having a kid is great. And yes, I can already imagine the next one (couldn't during labor, but now I already miss her first few weeks.) I keep thinking about moms and daughters, parents and children, how the potential is there for joy and also pain. Yikes.

We've seen lots of family and friends this summer who vacation in the Santa Cruz area. Calvin's family reuned (reunioned? reunited?) in Mt. Hermon for the past two weeks, so Adessa met lots of her cousins, second cousins, aunts and uncles. She did a great job being passed around- she was more relaxed about it than I was. The "mother-bear" imagery is making a lot of sense to me now, new emotions that come with the territory.

I've started taking Adessa to mommy groups in Santa Cruz run by nurses and lactation specialists. Its been fun to field the challenges of baby care with other new moms and trained professionals. Best, though, are my friend Sarah with her six month old, Sadie, and my cousin Annabelle and her five month old, Henry. They are full of helpful hints and encouragement and baby playtime fun. Annabelle and Henry came with us to the Mt. Hermon pool for Adessa and Henry's first dip. It was a little overwhelming, very bright, loud and splashy, and Adessa... didn't like it. Darn. She didn't like her first bath, though, and now enjoys them, so there's hope.

Calvin misses Adessa during the day now that he's back at work, and swears she grows and changes from morning to night. It has to be possible, as she is different every day. Quite a journey!

Many Firsts

Adessa is experiencing her firsts in everything, of course, as she is so recently on the planet. Her first time to Trader Joes, first time to the beach, first bath, we went on like that for her first few days. Now its bigger events, and we had a few last week up in Tahoe. It was her first big road trip (she did great, slept most of the time in the car), her first vacation, her first toe-dip into chilly Lake Tahoe (she didn't like it), her first foot-dip into warm sand(she wasn't sure about it), and her first family reunion (she benefited from many aunts and uncles to hold her and tell her she's cute). It was great fun, and I'll get pics up and running soon.

Adessa is now five weeks old, and it's flown by as everyone has promised. Truly precious, all-consuming, annointed time. We were definitely thrown much more into the present moment than we were used to, good place to be. And in five weeks she's changing so much already. She is much less of a bundle of reflexes and more of a focused, kicking, cooing, (still eating/pooping/sleeping) aware baby. Here's a list of developments--
Adessa:
*has started to enjoy her mobile;
*makes satisfied sighs after eating;
*kicks her legs and waves her arms, definitely favoring the left side in a toe-tapping, fiddle playing way--if you squint and imagine her with a baby violin, she looks like a bluegrass gal giving a concert;
*makes sustained eye contact with brow-furrowing, (she's serious about studying us and her world);
*sleeps in three hour chunks (we're quite accustomed to sleep deprivation and existing in a land of unfinished sentences and evening grouchiness);
and finally,
*she's growing a ton, she's already almost 11 pounds and outgrowing her
cute, pink clothing.

Babys don't seem too complex, and the directions of care are pretty straightforward so far: feed, change, bathe, hold, rock, repeat. So its exciting to think that, so far, we're probably doing a nice job of this parenting business. I doubt Adessa has anything so far that would qualify her for therapy. Yet. So far, we are all fresh and eager, Calvin, Adessa, and I. We are still trying our hardest. It feels like we are on each on stage for the others, or maybe just for ourselves: "In this scene, Keidi and Calvin will be playing loving parents. Calvin will say funny things to Adessa to make Keidi laugh, and then all will gaze lovingly at each other." So far, so good.

Baptizm and Chrismation

Adessa Faye and her cousin, Noah Samuel, were baptized and chrismated into the Orthodox Church on Sunday, July 1st (Grandma Beck's birthday). Their grandpa, Fr. Andrew, officiated, and Romina is her godmother. Noah and Adessa did great! It was amazing to pray through the service with our daughter and nephew in mind, prayers for their whole lives. The service is pretty comprehensive-- covers all traps and travails a kid could fall into, and spells out exactly what parents wish for their kids-- intentions in prayer format presented to God. I cried throughout, thinking about how absolutely not-in-charge I am, (thank goodness, really) and how the very most important thing for Adessa is her link to God. Lord, have mercy!

Dropping Letters, or, How We Came Upon Her Name.

There were distinct evolutions in choosing a name for our baby, especially when we found out it was going to be a girl. We went through the Bible, the saints, baby name books, daytime television, etc. and nothing was really jumping out at us. Calvin's family offered up the name
"Hadessah", as one of his nieces was studying the story of Esther in a Bible class. Hadessah (sometimes spelled Hedassah, or Hadassah) is Hebrew for Esther. Esther, throwing a twist into the whole name business, is Persian for Star. Adessa, then, is Lewis for Hadessah, as we played around with the hs and finally got rid of them altogether. So Adessa it is, and we'll tell her... what we just told you. She'll always have a topic of conversation when meeting people, she can weave the same convoluted story of its origin for them, or just tell people her parents created it from thin air. Hopefully she'll appreciate her name: that she is named for a strong, beautiful queen who was courageous in the face of death and saved her people. Pretty good!

*A note on her middle name* Faye, Adessa's middle name, is also Calvin's mom's middle name. We liked Faye, liked the ring to "Adessa Faye" and like to honor Edna Faye Lewis!

A little update: Today Adessa is two weeks old. She is still a pretty peaceful, calm baby. She eats well, sleeps a lot in 2-3 hour bursts, makes faces we think are so cute, and is terrifically photogenic. I'm starting to feel a lot more recovered and slightly more rested, and can get a little more done around the house. Calvin is wonderful. He is room-service, my personal assistant, the maid and butler, baby belch initiator and diaper engineer all in one.